Author Topic: Funny / embarrassing disability stories  (Read 2296 times)

Sofie

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Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« on: February 03, 2012, 10:29:52 AM »
1. Last week, I was at a quiz with a group of friends who are visually impaired. One of the rounds was pictures. >lol< Everyone was asked if they needed any help. Someone shouted "can you tell you us what the pictures are please?"

2. At the same meeting, I was sat next to a couple and the man starts touching my leg. He apologised, swapped seats for something and the first thing someone said to him was, "please don't touch my leg".

3. One problem I have, is recognising people. A few years ago, I was asked to meet a friend somewhere. I sent him a text saying I was outside and he said he's on his way. He turned up, said hello to me and I ignored him because I didn't recognise him. The same thing happened a week later. >blush<

oldtone27

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #1 on: February 03, 2012, 11:30:55 AM »
Rather like Sofie's incident I dropped off a VI member at a meeting venue while I parked the car. When I returned another member had arrived and they were standing like sentries either side of the entrance unaware of each other.

RoseRodent

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #2 on: February 03, 2012, 11:47:55 AM »
My dad (self-identifies as "blind") once took me with him to the station to help him meet another blind friend. His logic was sound, as a sighted person I would be able to see his friend approaching and guide the two of them to each other. So we watched as his friend's train came up on the arrivals board and I turned to my dad and said "Right then, what does Jeff look like?" to which he replied "I've no idea, I've never seen him and I've never asked". So here I am having been co-opted onto this mission because I possessed the faculty of sight, but without something to look *for* I was as useless as anyone. You may think that spotting a blind person in a station couldn't be that tricky, it's bound to be him - not so Birmingham New Street, that's blind central in there. Evidenced by the fact my dad has once been put on the wrong train by assistance services who assumed he must be the client because he was standing on the platform looking blind.

I'll be back later to tell once again the story of how I ended up naked and hanging upside down in a hospital, unless any of the Ouch regulars can recite the story from memory?

Incidentally, my dad is brilliant at the picture round on University Challenge. "Which Cathedral..." "Cologne" - "Correct"

I also had a blind friend who brought home a string of women, every one of them physically identical.
« Last Edit: February 03, 2012, 11:50:11 AM by RoseRodent »

thistlekitten

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #3 on: February 03, 2012, 12:50:35 PM »
 Due to my VI, I use a white stick.  About a year and a half ago I was travelling and a little old lady using a zimmer frame offered to help me get off the bus.  I'm in my 30s, about twice her height, and I'm very healthy.  It must've looked hysterical.

 >biggrin<
Count all wounds that brought you here,
Lay your blessings end to end

~ Cowboy Junkies

Pentesalie

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2012, 03:41:37 PM »
Last year, at a music festival I attended with my musician and 'mumming' friends, I went through a ford in the river in my wheelchair; something I've been wanting to do for years, pushed by a couple of them in costume. This year, it's going to be incorporated into their traditional mumming play, so I shall be dressed up as Britannia, with tridant, repelling the ancient enemy,  'Merman', the French man in the play, and propelled by other mumming characters. Really looking forward to it!
Ditchdweller, you know the river and music fesatival I mean!

ditchdwellers

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #5 on: February 03, 2012, 04:03:06 PM »
Ditchdweller, you know the river and music fesatival I mean!

I certainly do!  Funnily enough, I've just started thinking about this years festival circuit and trying to work out which ones to go to.  No decisions made as yet!


Jockice

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #6 on: February 03, 2012, 04:18:26 PM »
Na. Nothing embarrassing has ever happened to me.

Sofie

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #7 on: February 03, 2012, 04:36:36 PM »
Na. Nothing embarrassing has ever happened to me.

 >whistle<

My parents dog has a loud bark which makes me jump. Anyway, one day I had beige trousers on and had a cup of tea in my hand. The dog barked and I dropped my tea over my trousers. I looked as though I'd wet myself.

Hurtyback

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #8 on: February 03, 2012, 05:03:56 PM »
Pen, I hadn't realised that you are into mumming - that explains a lot  >lol< . I used to have some mummer friends when I was a folk dancer...

ditchdwellers

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #9 on: February 03, 2012, 05:19:56 PM »
One lovely sunny lunchtime, we decided we would walk to the pub with some friends.  There's a good route to the pub with a wheelchair accessible path across the fields, through the farm and down to the other side of the harbour to the pub.
I was in  my wheelchair, being pushed by hubby, when I found myself slowly heading towards the ditch.  I thought that my husband had spotted something interesting in the ditch and was taking me to see it - I'm a bit of a plant hunter - but Oh no.  Suddenly I heard my friend squeal and grab my wheelchair.  Hubby had let go of me, wandered off to fetch the ball for the dog, and was totally unaware that he had left me on a path that sloped  >yikes<

I know I like plants, but I really didn't want to get into the ditch to examine them at such close quarters!

It was the source of much hilarity in the pub.

Pentesalie

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #10 on: February 03, 2012, 06:49:15 PM »
Mrs H,
I usually sit on the sidelines getting the audience to join in with the chorus 'Rule Britannia, Britannia rules the waves... etc' and acting as 'minder' for the props, so end up with a collection of severed heads, hands, tights made to look like guts. The friends I stay with are musicians who helped revived the Mumming tradtion in their part of the country and they're also ex Morris dancers. Rosie had her own ladies 'side' and the reason she picked Henry was she thought his bum looked nice in the tight white trousers (he's going to kill me for saying that!). During the festival we turn out for several days, doing three or more performances a time, depending on where there's a space, with all donations going to fund the festival for the following year; then again just before Christmas, performing round the pubs to collect for the local children's hospice. The performance keeps expanding, so after I went through the ford in the wheelchair pushed by the mummers and it proved so popular, Rosie dubbed it 'another addition to the Mummers' Tradition', and I'll be properly garbed this year. Barry, who plays the Turkish Knight, has loads of props in his attic from his days with The Sealed Knot, so he's going to get me a Britannia type helmet, shield and trident.... he also has a 'two-person kamel' in his attic (don't ask!) and Rosie will make me the flowing white robe. I'm not the first wheelie to go through the ford though, there was an elderly guy, knicknamed 'The Wizard' (Ditchdweller, you problably remember him, he dressed up in multi-coloured robes with a pixie hat) who did it first; but sadly he died this autumn, his three-wheeler trike was knocked over by a motor bike. He'll be missed greatly, he was a real character of the festival.

Sunny Clouds

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #11 on: February 03, 2012, 07:50:28 PM »
Not really disability, just a less than perfect bit of me.

I usually get my eyes tested at a university.  This suits me because the student spends ages over it then the teacher checks it so effectively I'm getting two eye tests.

A few years back, one student got a bit too clever.  It was in the days when the chart was on the wall behind the chair with a mirror on the opposite wall.  He got me to stand up, walk to the mirror, take my glasses off, turn round and walk forward until I could read the biggest letter.

I walked forward, peering at the eye chart and fell over the chair.

Someone should have told him you don't have to be blind/partially sighted to have to get pretty close to an eye chart to see it clearly without glasses!
(I'm an obsessive problem-solver, so feel free to ignore any suggestions or solutions I offer, even if they sound terribly insistent.)

Otter

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Re: Funny / embarrassing disability stories
« Reply #12 on: February 04, 2012, 12:12:27 AM »
although I can not afford to continue I started a humanities BA at the OU back in 2007. Rang them explained that I was blind and asked if there would be any issues arising from the foundation module and exam - was told absolutely no problems, please apply

so the course arrived, first section and 25% of the overall mark - Fine Art...
okay which bit of the word blind did we not understand here?